that day *edited version*

better late than never. trust me, i still remember every single moments of that fateful day clearly.

reminiscing...
***

woke up early to prepare myself, online awhile and chatted with jackie, who was just as nervous as me. received lots of sms-s, from pearly and yoke, making me even more shacky.

arrived in school around 10.45 a.m. upon arrival, saw yue who had taken her slip. met kha wai and friends, they looked happy. nobody was crying, i guess overall's performances was good.

i lingered around but i knew i cant escape it. i entered the hall but pn. sakinah was nowhere to be seen. i approached pn. hanifah instead.

"cekgu, result i macam mane? nanti i heart attack kang..."
"cekgu pun tak tau...tengok le sendiri..." she was looking for my script.
"ni pun...bukak la... i tak tau result kamu..." she continued, sambil senyum2 kambing. me -_-"
then she told the reporters
"ni pun salah satu skolah kite punye murid cemerlang..."
...
reporters turned their attention at me. i was puzzled. i was like "wtf...."

my heart was beating so damn fast. i had this scary feeling throughout the process. suddenly, yoke, shin, kailiang, chian appeared out of nowhere and i was surrounded by them. i didnt even to have time to look at them * dah lama tak jumpa ma...* my hands were shaking.

"dont be nervous!!faster open...faster!!!..." yoke exclaimed.
i tell u, she was more nervous than me.
"aiyo..dont scare me. your hands are shaking le..." shin was trying to calm me down too.

>>fast forward>>

at last, it was done. i saw my results. i was kinda numb that time. so i didnt feel anything.
didnt have time to think anything. it was their turn...
ok. their result were ok too. after few session of comparing, yoke wanted to count her cgpa. i was so gelabah and my hands were still shaking.
"use hp la..." i mentioned. aiks, we were so kelam-kabut that time.
then the teacher borrowed her calculator to us.
i pressed the button
w.ww + x.xx + y.yy + z.zz =
but i accidentally pressed the clear button and the screen became empty again..
-_- "
"calm down" i told myself.

>>fast forward>>

pn hanifah passed a white paper to me, which the title was "biodata murid cemerlang"...
-_-" wtf!?!?!?!?
i was speechless. * my result is like damn bad, yet u still gave me this?"
the reporter came over and interviewed me, i was really at loss of words.
"how's ur feeling?"
"ok ler..."
"answer longer pls... describe ur feelings..."
"i m satisfied with it" * i was practically lying. get me, berbohong terang-terang...*
"so what's ur secret of ur success?"
"..."
*speechless man. wth?!?!?!. what had i achieve that u call it a success? menyindir ...*

>>>fast forward>>>

initially i choose to leave out this part but this entry wouldnt be a complete one without it. aiks...it was so embarassing, i mean, what on earth that they want to interview me? luckily i wasnt on air, if not, everyone can see how stupid i was that time. worse, ppl might think i pergi berebut-rebut masuk tv. haha.

then, chit chat with each other for some time while waiting for others to arrived. to be precise, we were waiting for the top-student (muh tyng) to come while kha wai made a call to randall and congratulated him in advance.

oh finally she arrived in mei chern's car, nt sure if anyone leaked out the results to her. and i saw this. * this's gonna be interesting*

someone practically dashing towards the hall, from the office if i wasnt mistaken. wearing a tudung. abit plump.
ermmm...
guessing?
try harder...
...
yeah la, her la, who else?

she sticked herself to muh tyng, hah, this is really an attempt to masuk tv lor! haha.

this is what i pressume,to be the lines that might have took place,
"i ni guru dia. i ajar matapelajaran XXXXXXX" muahahaha."

and this is a true story.
after the session of sandiwara, she asked "eh eh, mak siape ni? mak siape ni? "pointing another lady standing nearby, pressuming she was muh tyng's mother.
well her actual identity was stacy's mother and of course, stacy was -_-".

u see, memang warga sab suka bersandiwara.

anyway,
CONGRATULATIONS to MUH TYNG!!! she actually promised to give me a treat if she did get 4.00 *evil grin*

very well deserving. kinda expected. u see, she's always the top of the top in form6. haha. she worked hard for it and this is a very good example of hardwork pays.

>>fast forward>>

then, i walked to the office to have my photocopied documents certified. i asked the clerk if she can photocopy my results certificate and testimonials, that were given just now.
she refused to help me even i promised her that i'll pay. sigh. no choice but to have it done at petronas, walked back to school and lined up(pn.habibah was quite busy that time)

meanwhile, pearly arrived and was chatting with stacy and wen cheong. wanted to join but forced to return to the office and settle my things. by the time it was done, everyone left, the hall was closed, han xian arrived and we took a cab to town.

had our lunch quickly in low yat food court. after that, headed to redbox for sing-k session. earlier i phoned up may hwa and coincidently she and her friends just came out before we went in. greeted each other and asked abt her results. both she and sze jun did very well too. congrats.

then i was approached by a young pretty girl (haha), she was promoting some hair products. guess what? i was asked to be her model and i'll get a free loreal party proof gel in return. she insisted so terpaksa la. when it's done, she took a photo of mine for some-dunno-what- contest which i will surely lose. aiks... buat malu again ler... -_-"

not only me, but the others as well. all four of us.

sing k sing k sing k...fulled with crappy and crazy moments of course.

>> fast forward>>

we were supposed to stop at 6.00 p.m. but without realising it, we sang till 7 something. ooh, we were actually allowed to sing until 9.00 p.m. but since i promised to meet calvin around 8, we left early lor.

oh, that was the second time we left without kena halau. the 1st time also with wen cheong and in low yat as well.

meet calvin for dinner. before that, he did very well too, so congrats buddy!
we discussed alot of things. i must admit, we really talked about alot of serious stuff this time. that was really a meeting where we spilt out almost everything. yes, it was regarding our future.

left around 11.00 p.m. by the time i reached home, i was damn tired. get me? i was really exchausted.

and i was sick the next day. sigh.

p/s: here it is pearly, though abit late

the most important day in my life has passed. yes, it's over now. it was a meaningful and unforgettable day in my life.

i promise that i will write abt it. everything- what i did, what others did, my feeling, others' feeling and so on. not now, cause there's other more important things to do.

fyi, my result is bad. perhaps some might think i'm just exaggerating but, i know where i stand and i have my reasons why i m unhappy abt it.

i'm will be pretty busy these days. just like the days before-sleepless night. i'm very tired. why there's so much to do before and after it? i really need some rest.

there's so many things that need to be done, yet there isnt much time left.

save me...

at the 11th hour

i cant believe myself. it's so near. less than 12 hours before i will receive my results's script.

phone calls, friends's blog's posts, sms-s, replies in forums are making me damn nervous. seriously.this would be the peak.

something which i copied from friendster:
besides goin to school and take your results, u can also check online and through SMS. how?here is the way..

SMS
key in STPM space, followed by your I/C No. and send to 39003.

ONLINE
log on to www.mpm.edu.my


p/s: all services are only available starting from tmr 11am onwards.

ok, now who wanna try to check through sms?

haha. ok la, guys best wishes from me. we've tried our best. remember:-we survived form6!

stories from workplace

something from workplace worth mentioning. i feel that i really work today.

in the morning, i have to do the chores(cleaning) all by myself. colleague went to collect his result.

a negro man came in and gotta serve him. luckily jasnice arrived just in time, if nt how am i gonna layan his kerenah-mintak discount? anyway, he spent 1800 bucks.

then, 3 men came in and tried lots of clothes. they bought quite alot as well, arnd 900 bucks. so total is : 2700++
untung la boss

was extremely stressful today. need to alter few pants, especially in front of him. damn tension that time. practically the shop was turned upside down.besides, unexpectedly alot customers came in and tried everything. unlike the past few days where almost nobody stepped into the shop. it would be better if they come one by one. haha.

earlier, saw kam seng and gang, was informed abt the school's results. later in the afternoon, bumped into lawrence,andrew and the straight A1 gang, so i straight away congratulated them.wonder if that will pass some of his luck to me? haha

anyone heard of syn? i'm nt sure so i wont elaborate here. well, me wanted to buy some cakes from the cafe in hotel so i asked yow lee to tag along. few lifts were full so we cant get in. by that time,we realized there was a lot ppl in formal attire with the syn badge. mark my words, A LOT. everywhere in times square. at every corner u can see one. suddenly i remember that they are having some sort of part/dinner up there. anyway we got into one lift and as it moved up, it stopped at each floor and yeah, all also syn ppl. haha. i insisted that we must get to 14th floor(where the hotel is) to jakun awhile, but to my dismay, once the door of the lift opened, there were ppl trying to sell tickets. dahsyat.

and out of the blue moon, someone asked me to do him a favour by giving him 5 missed calls. try to figure out the reason behind it.

pre 16th march syndrome

it's my turn this coming thursday. i bet there wont be miracles, i have absolutely no idea on how it's gonna be. even for the overall performances, teachers cant predict anything.

here will be surprises. we will be shocked. some will be overjoyed while others will be disappointed. it's always like that for stpm. too bad, past years showed that the latter will dominate the environment.

• wen cheong came over, to remind me of the comin 16th. guess what, his main concern is that when should we go to take it.
• yow lee too, was experiencing the same time. we still indecisive over the 8 choices
• muh tyng and i agreed upon that we should seek advices from teachers and seniors regarding the upu stuff.
• pearly feels the heat too. who doesnt when ur colleague on and on reminds u on that?
• ai chen was right. we can hide but cant run away from it. we gotta face the cikgu-s in school.

it really bothers me, i cant stop thinking abt it -how's my future will be. i shouldnt make a fuss out of it but come on, it will be the last time. last time of taking result scripts of an open-examination.

annoyed by these stpm stuff? dont worry, it will be over in few days time. i promise.

2 more days to go...

SPM sangat cemerlang

oh i have a good news. sab did it again, as usual, as expeced.

for those who didnt know, there are 14 straight A1-s students. the number doubled from past years. highes record ever.

mulut cikgu-cikgu mesti tersenyum lebar.

whether it's the students becoming smarter, cut-off marks becoming lower, it's another problem, i dont care. all i can say is hardwork pays off for them.
congratts ya~

unlucky me

for the past few days, things just went wrong.

i'm having bad hair days. firstly, i will point my fingers at him(the hairstylist) then only blame myself for allowing myself to be his victim. ooh, i didnt ask for him actually but since 1st choice and 2nd choice werent around, i have no choice at all.

he took his own sweet time experimenting with my hair, a total of 1 and a half hour, inclusive of the 30 minutes waiting for my turn. he tried very hard to be friendly, or maybe he is really that formiable, but still, i deem he talked way too much. at times, i was at lost of words and only replied "oh icic, yakah?, hmm yalor.."

the main point- i'm nt satisfied with his job. sigh.

i forgotten the pin number for my atm card. *bang my head against the wall* i'm nt sure which combination of numbers and after 3 times, the card was blocked. so i need to go to the bank to settle it, and will be fined somemore. sigh

the fluorescent light in my room was out. i was in dark the whole nite yesterday. now that my father had replaced it, the new one seems like too bright and i feel hot. sigh.

and series of friendship issues drive me crazy. seriously.

at one instance, i feel i should change myself. why on earth i always burden myself with all these nonsense?

ppl say i think too much, too complicated, yet i cant help it, it's me. and perhaps by eliminating those ppl, i wil have less things to think about. from another point of view, i'm just running away from truth and hiding from the reality.

a reunion

yesterday, we had a reunion of former sabians through msn. it was all of a sudden actually.


so here's the list:- me, xin yee, kha wai, liang wen, felix, gianne, mohan

internet is such a powerful communication tool, connecting ppl from all parts of world. felix in uk, mohan in moscow, the rest scattered all over malaysia. haha.

for some who still think msn is only for borak- borak kosong, think again. ok, i admit we talked craps most of the time haha, we need to relieve stress also kan?
it was so fun to catch with one another and gossip of course.

and, we planned to organize a gathering in july, so let us wait and see if it will be successful.

report: pasar malam

pasar malam hit: 约定 by guang liang

it was still very crowded by 10.20 pm. luckily, i managed to grab some food and drink for supper. * in line with my gain-weight policy* haha.

bought a rojak-cd but some songs are spoilt. cis, geram betul la. so lain kali, belilah yg ori, jgn beli cetak rompak.

well just another NATO remark.( no, not that in perang dingin in sejarah form 4 la) it simply means no action, talk only...

current obsession: 只對你說 by jj lin jun jie (check out his album-cao cao)

p/s: pearly, i'm promoting ur idol...mine as well. haha.

###

"hey can u send the add again? i terdelete liao just now. asap ya..."

...

"hey i need the address now la...faster?"

...

"beng fye ah... address..."

imagine u need something urgently and u're still not getting getting the reply from that person?frustrating?

in that case, i'm truly sry to wen cheong. haha. who ask him sms me that time? at pasar malam ma, sangat bising and riuh-rendah. so didnt realise that 3 sms until another friend phoned.*sigh*

pre-16th march headache...

yes, i'm still alive! i was too tired and malas to blog actually.

the online application for uni-dateline is actually 10 working days from the day the results released but by that time, everyone will rushing to summit their application and if when the server down that time, then i kantoi?

now i terhegeh-hegeh settle it lor.

orang tua-tua ( not orang-orang tua) selalu cakap,

biar lambat asalkan selamat

i gotta disagree. lambat tak semestinya selamat. yang pasti -lambat tu memang lembab. * in this case*

gruelling task: pick 8 courses

"easy la..."

think again, if take into consideration of these, it wont be easy anymore.

interest, qualification, the university itself, job prospect - just to name a few. and i havent mention abt the selection process and karenah birokrasi...

at the end of the day, it's still the STPM results that matters, at least that's what we agreed upon-me, kha wai, nguk lin, yow lee.

had a phone conversation with muhtyng. we discussed the same thing and both of us are really confused and nervous right now.

it was followed by a bad news from xin yee,

keputusan SPM-cemerlang, STPM- MEMUASKAN *sahaja*

perhaps it's me being too pessimistic. well, if overall performances of the students are just mediocre, i guess chances of scoring good grades will be lowered.

havent go back to stare at the list again after this. sigh.

anyone can lend me a helping hand- i want advices and opinions, i'm really desperate for it...

quote of the day:

"what will be,will be"

xin yee (1987-now)

guess what, today is 9th, which means

STPM RESULTS ~NEXT WEEK!

oh, i'm really nervous. it really bothers me, especially i have no idea at all, how it will turn out. trust me, i have no absolute confident on a single subject.worse, PA can be the dark horse.

i imagined if i really did badly, i only have myself to blame, i destroyed my future with my own hands.

i feel insecure.

countdown: 7 days

hooray. march is here *finally*. however i'm still in disbelief. 3 months had passed since the last day of stpm.

a friend once commented that feb was the shortest month of the year , yet it dragged to be longest. for me, it was full of changes.

in february:
missed the genting trip. found out that another friend got attached. lonely single awareness day. pearly started working, so is manyit, stacy, hanxian, wen cheong. rowena's new look. yoke's self-acclaimed 魅力沒法擋. fei resigned. missed the leo and miriam's concert.

besides that, i:
befriended with someone. annoyed by an idiot. disappointed with one's decision. alienated a group of friends. understand myself better. obsessed with 约定.

in march, it's gonna be worse. results will be released, as well as unsolved issues at workplace, friendship matters, inner-self conflicts, trust issues. i need to make important decisions.decisions that most likely will change my life forever and there is really no turning back for this on. with my indecisive nature, it aint gonna be easy.

many gonna celebrate their birthdays in march. that's gonna burn a hole in my pocket, and headaches searching for suitable presents.

before i forget, happy birthday, tony chin! my pet-bro is turning 16 and i m stepping into 20 soon. haha. i want a choc banana cake from big apple restaurant!

i m bored of my hair. the color faded away too. it's turning darker and becoming black. ooh, 88 bucks gone like that. should i get a haircut?haha

ppl around me are behaving in a really weird manner. well i'm an eccentric fella too. haha

the arrogant and lan c guy suddenly became very friendly, towards me. we hardly know each other yet he dare to enter the shop and chit-chatting with me. -_-"

sometimes i wonder how fast ppl can change? i have the answer now- very fast. a friend got promoted and within minutes, i really notice the difference in his attitude.

i used to hate myself for being selfish, especially the naive ones always scold me and i feel guilty. now, not anymore! everyone is being selfish too, some to the extent of cheating and betrayal. i need to look into my own interest and protect myself too.

another 2 weeks before stpm results will be released...

just me and my boring life

yesterday was saturday-and sales was 0. oh, i really couldnt believe it :S

sang's back in action, would be in lot 10 for 2days, and that means i would have a regular partner to have meal with.

pearly came to collect the weighing scale which she asked me to grab it at the last day of watson's offer. (detailed enough?)

stacy and hamtaro came in not long after pearly. 3 of us catch up with each other.

***
i realise what's the difference between close friends and normal friends.

and i found out that there are really ppl whom i cant get along with, so there will be ppl whom i can actually get along with, even at the 1st conversation.

and 3 of us realise the importance of choosing a marketable degree with a bright job prospect. we still have much to learn.
we need to plan our future. another headache.

kawai too, dropped by, after buying kelly's cd and vcd. and that certainly reminded me of leo and miriam's concert which i was so eager to watch. haih.

and my colleague's comment made me realise something-who's the friend that i'm really comfortable with.

before i forget, did i mention even workplace is another issue? things got so messed up and i felt like i'm the one who got screwed up. sigh.

and i just remember, i m holding the keys. i cant be late. and it's 2.38 a.m. now!

before i speak, let me reveal some parts of my message history with a friend.

me, she

part 1.
i cant stand la..go out lo..
cant stand mai sit lor
NOTHIN la..
me too la. bored like hell
u no car meh?
realli no wo
haiz..nothin.now i jz wan ppl hv car

part 2.
wan go kai kai?
when?
now. u hv car?if no. nothin. hehe
haha now watch tv
go hell la.

the question is - who she thinks she is?

just because she is cute, adorable, and what so ever, knowing her as a friend doesnt mean that i m among few guys going after her.

besides, it was another friend who introduced her to me. and i thought i should be nice to my friend's friend.

now i know that having a car- is one of the things in her friends-must-have list.

*sigh*

and that definitely earns her a place in my personal black-listed ppl as well. aint that cool?

some ppl are just choosy in choosing friends as well. looks, money, career and what else that counts?

that's a very good example, when i keep mention-that i choose friends as well. i dont need such friend. friend who desert me when i'm worthless. haha. come on, this is life, i told myself

p/s: well, i left some hidden clue abt that person here. i believe the observant ones will notice it.

约定...你

everyone is crazy abt michael's 约定. * kalau nama lagu pun tak pernah dengar, hantuk kepala kat dinding*

watched the mv(music video) the other day. i agree with most, it is very similar to 童話 .- the beginning, the piano, the style, the concept, the settings, lightings and so on.


it takes some time to load.

at 1st i even think that it is the sequel to 童話. well, too early to tell if it can regain 童話 's success.

anyway, malaysia boleh! haha.

i was really pissed off by a worker of WWF.

the day before one of them approached me and bried me abt WWF and related stuff. when she found out that i'm actually that young-financially unstable, she then asked me to help her to promote abt the fund-raising event to others which i agreed.

she was a really polite and nice lady.

and yesterday, it was a totally different story.while i walked pass the same path, another lady gave me a stare (coz i buat tak tau when i saw her) and pointed at the banner.
"heard of WWF?" she asked.
i nodded my head, trying to tell her that others i ady brief me on it. but that wasnt the case.
" oh, then have u fill the form?" she again asked.
"err.. no" i told her.
"why?" she questioned me.
i was stunned.
as she came nearer, i told her "i dont have any credit cards..."
"another excuse" she replied, very sarcastic, just like the lady at the star edufair.

well, i appreciate her job, which is collecting fund for WWF, it aint easy. i know that. maybe others gave her a hard time. perhaps she was too pressured. whatever reason it is, it's not justiable for her to be so rude.

she should have pick those richer ppl, at least ppl with a stable job, not part-timer like me. it's obvious that ppl like me is financially unstable and she should have expect that.

i'm not trying to make her look bad. just that i have a feeling that she's just worry abt her personal target.who knows how much commission she can get if someone actually sign up? i'm not sure abt it. i dont know if it's a volunteer work, so i wont assume things.

in short, she's rude.

returning back to workplace after my offday (which is a thursday) -nvr fail to offer me surprises. either it is a good or bad news, it's another thing.

my colleague's friend, wilson dropped by and the next thing he did was- promote this skim piramid (something like skim cepat kaya) and of course, both of us didnt fall for it.

mr boss suddenly appeared out of nowhere and gave 3 of us a shock. there was some stuff that both of us tried to convince him and we failed.

then it was me and my colleague's turn to sort things out-work related stuff, which could really screw us up if left unresolved. and i'm glad i take this approach, though i fear it might ruin everything. and luckily,it didnt.

jackie and his friend, caroline, came in and i had alittle chat with him for awhile before kha wai and yow lee gave me a surprise visit. my plan was to catch up with jackie before joining the latter for drinks.

i guess i talked too much, by the time kha wai and yow lee returned, me still chating with jackie and caroline. somehow, later majlis bersurai lor- jackie and caroline went to look for another friend, yow lee back to her workplace and that left kha wai at my place.

we chatted and discussed alot of things, ranging from studies, work, career, love and so on. no doubt, he is the best choice when comes to more mature stuff. by having friends who work in different fields, one can really learn alot bout their experiences. thus, get a clearer picture of the outside world.

he left, the other 2 came back. 3 of us went to the hotel's cafe to buy some cakes, a treat for jackie and a new friend-caroline. 3 of us share one thing in common-so sampat. 3 of really made a scene there. at 1st, rambang mata when choosing the cakes, so bising and kecoh, and jakun as well. 3 chinese merepek-repek and mengarut in bm. haha. i guess even may lee who was serving us, also -_-". luckily we didnt kena halau by the management lor.

satu monyet, satu babi and satu lagi di-babikan(me).
monyet bergayut-gayut, babi bergolek-golek...
* tak ingat yg lain2 la*

they actually planned to peep at justin lo, who was having meet-fans-session at sg wang and i was thinking of tagging along but in the end, tak jadi. that monkey was so full that he didnt want to move.

maybe it was coincident, maybe it wasnt, jackie's frens, 2 of them was nearby so they came in to look for him. hmm...let me see, there were 6 ppl in the shop * so meriah* but none of them are customers.*sweat sweat* haha.
well, if edison and ah lok came in too, we could have a gathering and if boss suddenly turned out, then kanasai la.

by the way, they left around 8pm and the next thing i realised was- time passed by so fast. haha.

sampat-ing really fun lor so that i can forget abt nuisance that's been bothering me, at least for that time being.

p/s: thank you-jackie, and caroline for brighthen up my day!

stpm results...

it's been confirmed-STPM results will be released on 16th march. and it's approximately 3 weeks from now. shall i start the countdown? at least i have something to look forward to.

to be frank, i dont expect to pass with flying colors but of course i hope it'll be good enough to secure a place in uni, in the course that i want.

farhan once said, taking results is more terrifying than sitting for the exam itself. he was right. actually it started to bother me, who wont be worry?

i shall enjoy the last few weeks of idle life. after getting the result, there's no more excuse. gotta start to plan abt my future, seriously.

growing up aint that easy, now i realise that.

no! dont get me wrong. i'm not trying to empathize. it just struck my mind and came up with that entry. haha.

thx again for reading...

mr lonely?

valentine's day is over and love is still in the air....

it seems like everyone around me is in relationships and i'm the only black sheep. haha.

of course, i hope to have someone with me, talk to me, listen to me, understands me, loves me and so on, but that doesnt mean i need to rush into a relationship.

what most of them say?-"hey, even mr (u name it) has attached, when's ur turn?faster go find someone la..." "nobody wants me haha..." that's how i usually reply them.

i could only laugh when i heard that. the way they talk, as if finding a gf is as simple as choosing a bottle of drinks? or just another mix and match ?

no doubt, it can be that way,that easy, simply pick someone and see if the relationship can bossom. haha. i wonder if it really works? yes- answer given by a friend.

yesterday, siew wai and his gf dropped by. i was stunned by her blond hair, nearly cant recognise her. catched up with him alittle. then, stacy and her bf as well as eunice and her bf suddenly came into the pic, and it was like a mini gathering for lovers, getting to know each other amongst them, that made me felt so awkward too -_-". my colleagues even thought it was planned. haha.

aiks..

haha im at the edge of hitting 2-0 and i still wonder what love is all about...* laugh at myself*